Brothers
We are all supposed to love our siblings unconditionally. Supposed to. Unfortunately sometimes it's not as easy to like them. And there is a difference between 'love' and 'like'. In this instance, I do love my brother. Have since he was born and I went around bragging to everyone that I had a baby brother. Still do- as recently as last weekend dancing with him at his wedding reception. It's the 'like' part that I find myself having a problem with.
The "golden child" is back in favor. He never really falls out of favor, just fades in to the background or is criticized by the parents for his rash decisions or bouts of unthoughtfulness. For a while, it seems the balance of the universe is normal. Then the "golden child" says or does something utterly mundane, which is taken by the family as something worthy of the next peace prize, and he regains his title once more.
To the responsible, hardworking, contributing member of the family that has a moral code and sense of duty (and apparently an issue with saying no), this can be quite frustrating and leads to the development of feelings of neglect, unworthiness, and resentment. I....(I mean -this particular contributing family member)...find myself feeling that all the effort that I put in on a day to day basis is overlooked for one shining moment of clarity on my brother's part. And yet the reverse is true. One lapse on my part, (where I actually said no to something) is enough to ensure the silent treatment for at least 3 days. Sometimes I welcome the quiet. I tend to ingest less Advil.
Did they all forget that he decided to get married all the way on the other side of the country, without so much as a care for his family? Did they forget that he emphasized how important it was for his friends of 2 years to be there, but not his own parents? (How could they forget when he repeated it in his thank you speech at the ridiculously overdone reception that was thrown by his now mother-in-law since she missed the actual wedding?) Did they forget the manner in which he left for BC in the first place? The words that he so casually threw at them without any remorse?
They must have.
The "golden child" is back in favor. He never really falls out of favor, just fades in to the background or is criticized by the parents for his rash decisions or bouts of unthoughtfulness. For a while, it seems the balance of the universe is normal. Then the "golden child" says or does something utterly mundane, which is taken by the family as something worthy of the next peace prize, and he regains his title once more.
To the responsible, hardworking, contributing member of the family that has a moral code and sense of duty (and apparently an issue with saying no), this can be quite frustrating and leads to the development of feelings of neglect, unworthiness, and resentment. I....(I mean -this particular contributing family member)...find myself feeling that all the effort that I put in on a day to day basis is overlooked for one shining moment of clarity on my brother's part. And yet the reverse is true. One lapse on my part, (where I actually said no to something) is enough to ensure the silent treatment for at least 3 days. Sometimes I welcome the quiet. I tend to ingest less Advil.
Did they all forget that he decided to get married all the way on the other side of the country, without so much as a care for his family? Did they forget that he emphasized how important it was for his friends of 2 years to be there, but not his own parents? (How could they forget when he repeated it in his thank you speech at the ridiculously overdone reception that was thrown by his now mother-in-law since she missed the actual wedding?) Did they forget the manner in which he left for BC in the first place? The words that he so casually threw at them without any remorse?
They must have.
posted by sandboxtoy at 10:29 PM
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